Friday, 19 August 2016

Narrative Writing

The rhino was following me to the beach. I was walking faster and faster.The rhino was walking faster too. All I could think about was finding my bag. I was shaking. When I got to the beach, I went where there were a lot of people so I could lose sight of the rhino.

I peeked around the people and saw the rhino again, “ Arghhhhh, why is he still there ??? ”, I said. I didn’t have time to swim so I walked quickly to the walkway, glancing around as much as I could to see if I could spot my bag.The rhino was still following me.  
I saw my house from a distance and decided to run. I ran and ran, I didn’t want to look around because that would slow me down. But I had to turn around and as I did, but I tripped. Fortunately I was right outside my house, suddenly the rhino appeared and I saw that he was carrying my bag in his mouth. He opened his mouth and dropped my bag, this whole time he had been trying to let me know that he had been looking after my bag. I felt relieved and grateful.

1 comment:

  1. I really liked your introduction. It hooked me in and made me want to keep on reading. I think it would be helpful to look at when commas and fullstops can be used.
    I think it was funny how the rhino had your bag. A good plot twist.